Purim is approaching! 🎭 How do you deal with choosing a costume and the child's indecision?

Purim is approaching, and excitement is at its peak – costumes, parties, mishloach manot... But alongside the joy, for parents of children (especially children with ADHD), this period can be particularly challenging. Choosing a costume, indecisiveness, fear of self-image, and even last-minute regret – all of these can lead to frustration, stress, and even tears. So how to cope? Here are some tools to help you get through this period calmly and empowering:

Give the child a sense of control – but within clear boundaries

Children with ADHD (and not just them) sometimes struggle to make decisions, especially when there are too many options. Let them choose from 2–3 predefined options. For instance: "Would you prefer to be a superhero, an animal, or a character from a movie?" This way, you reduce the overload and help them focus.

Emphasize the experience, not the appearance

Many children are afraid that their costume "won’t be liked" or that they "won’t look good enough." It’s important to remind them (and ourselves) that the goal is to enjoy, play, and feel good about themselves. You can ask: "How does this costume make you feel?" instead of "How does it look?"

Coping with last-minute regret

It happens often – the child chooses a costume, and then, just before the party, they regret it. Instead of stressing, try to empathize:

Listen: "I understand you feel this isn’t the costume you want right now."

Reflect: "It really can be frustrating to feel like that."

Provide a tailored solution: If it’s possible to change something small in the costume (add an accessory, change an item), try to do so. If not, encourage them to focus on the experience rather than the costume itself.

Boosting self-esteem

Purim is a great opportunity to work on self-esteem. Make sure to praise the child for their choice, creativity, or courage in being who they want to be. For example: "What an original idea you have!" or "I’m proud of you for choosing something you love."

Preparation in advance – practicing social situations

If the child is worried about others' reactions, you can practice with them in advance how to handle comments. For example: "If someone says something unpleasant, what can you say back?" Give them tools like a smile, a short response ("I like my costume"), or even ignoring.

Remember – you are the child’s emotional model

If you stay calm, empathetic, and smiling – the child will also feel more secure. Try not to stress if things don’t go exactly according to plan. Purim is a holiday of joy, creativity, and flexibility – and that’s the message you want to convey.

Ultimately, Purim is a great opportunity to strengthen the bond with your child, help them cope with emotional challenges, and give them tools for life. So take a deep breath, enjoy the process – and remember that the best costume is one of self-confidence and love.

Happy Purim! 🎭

תודה שקראתם!

אשמח שתצטרפו אליי ברשתות החברתיות ותמשיכו לעקוב אחרי תכנים מעשירים על הורות, חינוך והתפתחות: